i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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