yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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