why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
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