Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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