Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
