I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
