So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Randomize
