You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
