Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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