How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
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Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
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My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize