i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
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