my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Randomize