He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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