try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Randomize