dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
