I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
