i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Come see our sink grown plant.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
