What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
