I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
