we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I'm at about main and main street
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
