I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
The struggles of a small town man whore
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
