this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Couch. On fire.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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