You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I had to cum in my sink.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
