A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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