Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
The air taste purple.
Randomize
