I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Randomize
