just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Randomize
