Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
