i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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