you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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