i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Terrible idea I love it
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
