I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Randomize