The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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