This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I'm too high and old for this...
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
