he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
