Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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