Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
