the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
