What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
why didn't you poke me back
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
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