there's paper in my vomit.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
