I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
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we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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