Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
