How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Less talking, more tequila
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
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