I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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