So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
foreskin is a definite game changer
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
