you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize