very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
last night I used snow as a chaser
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize