So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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