don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
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