i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
