I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
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